A (Still) Little Goblin's Adventure : Treasures of Aht Urhgan Fablinix: Assault Me Baby, One More Time(04/07/2006)

"Assault" means to make a sudden attack on a fortified area. Your goal in Assault is to fight through an enemy stronghold with a small, elite unit of mercenaries.
In order to participate, you must first go to the Commissions Agency, where you can view a list of available tasks. Choose any task that interests you, and gather the number of people necessary to finish the operation. Then, enter the enemy's stronghold and complete your tasks.
If you manage to complete the Assault and make it back alive, the Empire of Aht Urhgan will reward you with fame and an appropriate reward.
Assault can only be undertaken by small, select groups. In exchange, the Imperial Army will evacuate any non-participants so that you can fully concentrate on the operation. On the other hand, no one will be around to help if you find yourself in trouble, so you must always be on guard.


And this must be the Commissions Agency. Isn't editing wonderful?

Mandraggy: "Excusing me, fine sir. My party liking to join Assault."

Agency Goon: "I'm sorry. All adventurers must be this tall to apply."

Tonberry King: "Insolence! Zee tip of my crown iz clearly over zee line. See! Now let us in before I give you a taste of zee kink's justice!"

Agency Goon: "Hey! If you don't put that knife down, I'm going to call my supervisor!"

Tonberry King: "Alright, alright. Zere iz no need to be gettink zee antz in zee pantz. Maybe zis message from your Uncle 'Gil' vill straighten thinks out, no?"


The Tonberry King pulls a small pouch from his pocket.

Agency Goon. "Well, wouldn't you know? We have a spot opening right now. This way, sirs!"

"What was in the bag, Kink?"

Tonberry King: "Vhat do you think? A message from his Uncle Gil! I knew zere might be trouble, so I had zee old man kidnapped!"

Whoa...

Mandraggy: "So, what courses should we be taking?"

How about the one farthest away from our ransoming royalty?

Tonberry King: "Ve require a test fit for a kink! Give us zee most challenging mission, and I, alone, shall complete it record time!"

Note: There are various courses offered at the Commissions Agency. We suggest that you select one that is best suited to your current party's abilities, and not necessarily one fit for a kink.

This place is nice. Reminds me of home...if you replaced all the dark, gloomy mountains and rocks with green meadows and cute, furry bunnies.

Mandraggy: "We must be checking in with Immortals."

Immortal? Does that mean if I chop off his head, I get all his knowledge of the universe?

mortal: ?I've already received word about you three from the Commissions Agency, and there's no way I'm—?

Tonberry King: "Ah, but maybe if you first have a look at this message from your Uncle 'Gold Ingot.'"


Could he really have an uncle named... No...

ortal: "How dare you use my family to... Very well. Give me your names and I shall enter them in the register."

Tonberry King: "I am zee lord of Uggalepih and zee konqueror of Elshimo! I am zee Tonberry Kink!"

Mandraggy: "I'm being Mandraggy Mandragorian III, of Clan Mandragoriate."


"And um... I'm, uh... Senor Treant. That's with a capital S. Oh, and don't forget the squiggly thing over the n."

Immortal: "Your objectives lie beyond that gate. Defeat as many of the monsters as possible. Your reward will be based on your performance."

"Reward? Now you're talking! Wait a minute--did you guys bring your equipment? I have my mask, my wild onions, and my tin cup..."

Tonberry King: "I have my lantern, my knife, and my crown, and zat iz all I need! Well, maybe that and a pair of pants."

Mandraggy: "Um... I seem to be leaving my vermilion cloaks at home. But there is no need for worrying. I have my lucky 3-leaf mandragora bud!"


Why don't I feel any safer...?